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Adventures in Life, Parenting & Real World Navigation Through the Eyes of a Former Foster Kid, Current Foster Parent
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The Many Voices Foster Care, Adoption & Child Advocacy
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Holding on to Hope - We do our work with vision. And we do our work with hope. *We who are foster care advocates will have days of disappointment. *We will weather waves of ...
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The Revolution will not be danced! - That was the title of the dance piece that my son choreographed taught to 11 other dancers and performed himself at college. At almost 12 minutes it w...9 months ago
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Are Adoptees Blank Slates? - An Adoptee on twitter made an observation that summed up the reality for many adoptees and I can’t find the tweet. Argh. The gist of it was even if you get...11 months ago
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Hello world! - Welcome to WordPress. This is your first post. Edit or delete it, then start writing!… The post Hello world! first appeared on Judy M. Miller.11 months ago
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Southwest Moonlight and Making Babies: An Excerpt from Pushing up the Sky - Fall, 1972. “I want to cancel my appointment,” I told the woman at the front desk. “Instead of birth control counseling I need a pregnancy test.” The docto...1 year ago
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What's the context for "alienating behaviors"? (Baselines and all that) - It would seem quite likely that some parents do sometimes do or say things that can be considered "alienating behaviors”—actions that might make child...1 year ago
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Goodbye, WordPress! - I think I’ve hated WordPress since I first started using it, and that hatred has only grown as it has morphed into an unusable mess with an obtuse interfac...1 year ago
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How’d it happen - Today at work, I was thinking about my life. Man, I have a job. I have an apartment. I pay my bills. I am not in prison or pregnant or living on the stree...1 year ago
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Les 11.000 mailles - “Academia Catavencu” - 18 juilliet 2001 Chers lecteurs, Ce qui suit est une petite histoire qui précède la visite en Roumanie d’un premier-ministre français et de sa suite. Le...2 years ago
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Blogging About Saving Money - A few weeks ago, I applied for a job. (Actually, it was several weeks ago, but I have had a hard time getting back to this post for some reason.) Anyway, y...
3 years ago -
Why is Home Décor Essential? - A day spent alone, and one spent with friends will get you in an entirely different mood. Your mood depends on your company and surroundings. This theory d...3 years ago
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SOUND AND FURY - It’s the noise that brings me to my knees. Noise I can’t control. I spoke with my psychiatrist regarding it a year ago. He mused on it for a few, shifted i...4 years ago
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Is Foster Income Taxable? What Foster Parents Should Know About Income Tax - Is Foster Income Taxable? What Foster Parents Should Know About Income Tax IS FOSTER INCOME TAXABLE? You do not have to report foster payments you receiv...4 years ago
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First/birth mothers: Letting out the secret of the child no one knows about; telling the family about my first child, relinquished to adoption - Jane and Lorraine, 1982 New York's Gov. Cuomo announced yesterday that more than 3,600 people applied for their original birth certificates within 48 hou...
4 years ago -
Black Friday Baby, Part Two - Egad, I’ve been dreading this, but I did promise. So here’s the rest of Funny Alabama Daddy’s very funny riff on how funny it is to be white raising a blac...5 years ago
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Dumping a Social Worker's Cards on the Table: Adoption Cannot Solve Abortion - "Everyone has strengths within them that can create solutions. They just need some organizing." I repeat this phrase often to my students. I repeat it in...
5 years ago -
Feelings Wheel: Moving Beyond Primal Emotions - Click to enlarge image I recently learned about this tool during an Emotional Poverty training. Our basic human emotions are primal, and based on surviva...
5 years ago -
Tips on Breastfeeding and Snacks for Breastfeeding Your New Baby - So you are probably here because you wanna know exactly more information on breastfeeding and the best snacks for breastfeeding too? One of the greatest bo...5 years ago
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One Child at a Time* - With my foster family in South Korea I recently published an essay titled, *“Colonized through Adoption.” *After I published the piece, I realized that I ...
5 years ago -
My last CPS meeting - I don't remember the "official" name of the meeting I attended this morning. But the gist of it was to find out what the State could do to salvage the plac...6 years ago
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ASAC/AI Conference: Voices of Adoption Literary Event - ASAC presents Voices of Adoption, an evening of literary readings, featuring Jennifer Kwon Dobbs, Susan Harness, Julayne Lee, and Lee Herrick (and many oth...6 years ago
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CLAIRVOYANT HEALING, COLON CLEANSING, AND HYPNOTHERAPY: THE WEIRDEST THINGS WE’VE DONE IN THE NAME OF HEALTH | SELFIE EPISODE 45 - Sarah saw a hypnotherapist. Kristen went to a faith healer. One of us has had her colon roto-routed. We are talking about the most wacky and woo-woo thin...6 years ago
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Visiting the DMV With an Immigrant, Transracially Adopted Child - Recently I went with my anxious teenager to the DMV to take the test for her learners permit. We arrived expecting lines and nerves about her test. But wha...
6 years ago -
The February 2018 Update is... - that there is no update. Really, are you at all surprised? We’re doing well though. My attorney wants me to put the blog back up and start writing ag...6 years ago
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The Wall - I hit the wall hard on Friday night and I woke up Saturday morning just as miserable as I had gone to bed. So I . spent the entire day in my hiding in my ...6 years ago
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Voice Clips - I sent up a request on the Chinese subreddit asking if anyone was conversationally fluent in Hokkien/Mandarin to see if they could translate (or get the gi...6 years ago
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The latest - So much to say! I'll do bullet points here at first. 1. The state didn't ask bio dad if they could share information with us; apparently the only children ...6 years ago
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Where There’s Smoke… - finished transcribing a Supernatural fan fic i started writing over the summer today. it comes in at about 4.5k words so far, but there’s still …6 years ago
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Still coping with a difficult, aging parent. Still sane. I think. - I'm taking a break, well, a physical break, from tending to my mom today. Mentally it's tough to completely turn off when acting as caregiver to a parent w...7 years ago
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Introducing Becca - Hi everyone! I'm back! Sort of. Let me explain. Many of you know me as a Rebecca Hawkes, but in real life most people know me as Becca Bryer. Rebecca Hawk...
7 years ago -
seeds - Sorry I disappeared again. It wasn’t a good time to talk about what’s going on because still nothing is resolved but sometimes I want to talk anyway and I’...7 years ago
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Never Lose Hope - It sometimes feels "as if" I'm dragging my mind and body through quick sand. Writing that sentence releases tears. 2013 was a hard year. So was 2014...
7 years ago -
In the night - PTSD is a bitch. One hour of sleep, or perhaps if I am lucky I get two or three. But sleep is not something I can take for granted, so the usual routine is...7 years ago
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(Birth) Moms ~ Search for Your (adult) Child! - *from: Wild Women Sisterhood* *FULL MOON PRAYER by Rumi What in your life is Calling you, When all the noise is silenced, The meetings adjourne...
8 years ago -
College Scholarships for Adoptees - *Did you know that there are scholarships available for adopted and foster children?* Many of these scholarships cover tuition cost, living expenses, c...
8 years ago -
All Parent Blogs in One Place! - If you are looking for all of my blog posts pertaining to therapeutic parenting, you can locate those on my coaching site. Neat and tidy. I'll see you over...
8 years ago -
I HATE THE WORD ADOPTION! - Back in the 1980s MaryAnne Cohen wrote the following poem. It is published in my first book *shedding light on...The Dark Side of Adoption, *(1988): *ADOP...8 years ago
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Facing Pride of Abandonment - Despite the number of times she said it, I do not think she was “proud” she gave away her child. At least I do not think she was proud in the literal sen...8 years ago
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10 Cara Mengatasi Rambut Rontok Secara Alami Yang Praktis dan Mudah - Cara mengatasi rambut rontok secara alami seringkali menjadi pilihan yang dilakukan oleh banyak orang karena dianggap mudah dan terjangkau, selain itu ju...8 years ago
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Manfaat Buah Kapulaga bagi Kesehatan Tubuh - Manfaat Buah Kapulaga bagi Kesehatan Tubuh – Buah kapulaga selama ini lebih dikenal sebagai rempah rempah untuk bumbu masakan. Selain digunakan sebagai b...8 years ago
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Chinese New Year Chapter Books for Older Kids - There are many lists about Chinese New Year books for preschoolers and young elementary students, but very few highlight chapter books for middle graders a...
8 years ago -
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Shout It Out - So, between taking my sweet Granddaughter to Disney World and getting into our family place at the lake, I’ve spent most of September barely on social med...
9 years ago -
Guest Post: David Smolin shares his experience as a speaker at this years Christians Alliance for Orphan (CAFO) summit - In CAFO’s own words their summit “inspires and equips Christians to care for orphans with wisdom-guided love. The CAFO Summit has become the national hub...
9 years ago -
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Near and Far - Here's what Christmas was like when I was a child in Australia: presents in the morning around our family Christmas tree, then over to our grandparents' h...
9 years ago -
A neat and tidy ending - I guess I was kind of waiting for one, hoping that I could write that final post that pulled everything together, made it all just fine – the ending that m...10 years ago
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School Supply List 2014-2015 - I currently have 7 children, 5 of whom will be in public school this year. Their combined school supply list is forever long. Good thing I buy things on sa...10 years ago
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Small Update - I mailed my Dad’s Father’s Day card, which included my letter to him asking him to adopt me back, today. Now I’m nervous, but it probably won’t even get to...10 years ago
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Letting go of The Hard. Good night. - Why couldn't I just leave it here, unfinished? I don't know. Yet, it haunts me. This year, I become aware, one of the things I really needed to do was "Let...
10 years ago -
They Just Don't Get It . . . - I have decided to take my son out of school at the end of this year. For years I was intent on the fact that he would be in school as long as they allowed...10 years ago
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A recipe for co-parenting when divorced - These days I am getting a steady flow of referrals from a new family court judge. He'll order that a child's parents both submit to psychological evaluati...10 years ago
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Great Deal on gDiapers Hybrid Cloth Diapers with Flushable Liners (LIMITED TIME) - One of my favorite ways to be a thrifty foster parent is to cloth diaper! For our family it's been a fantastic way to protect our foster babies' tender tu...
10 years ago -
Not the White Christmas I am Dreaming of.... - In light of the totally and complete idiocy surrounding the new debate about whether a FICTIONAL character is black or white, (and the subsequent white wa...
11 years ago -
Daiily Bastardette moving to Word Press - After a couple years of talking to myself about it, I have decided to transfer *The Daily Bastardette* from Blogger to Word Press. The final straw cam...
11 years ago -
Well, Hello There - Hello! How are you? I miss writing here so much! But that is not what I am here today to say. [image: Adoption Blogger Interview Project 2013] The Adoptio...11 years ago
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Party Animals - *I understand this post is almost a year over due, but the theme of this blog is better late then never. * All I wanted for my bachelorette party was to...
11 years ago -
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Luca's 3rd Bday - I was there the day he was born. I can not believe this little baby is THREE years old. (Click to Enlarge) Someone please tell him to stop growing...
11 years ago -
Trauma Doesn't Tell Time - Robyn Gobbel, LCSW, wrote a blog post regarding trauma, implicit and explicit memories. I don't know Robyn but now I'm seriously crushing on her. Here is...11 years ago
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Guess who got a job? - Me. That's who! My background check was finally fixed and the transitional living program offered me a job. It will be a night job that doesn't pay enoug...11 years ago
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Oh My it has been AWHILE! - Well... by the looks of things around the blog I got busy :) I can't believe it has been since August that I last updated on our journey. I don't have time...11 years ago
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Orphans, Orphanage in children's movies and books? - If you are a member of the adoption triad you probably know of Disney's need to kill off a parent in every movie. We avoid any movies that I know have a ne...11 years ago
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Defining Ourselves for Ourselves - An Alumni Sister asked, “how do we learn to define ourselves for ourselves and learn to not see ourselves as cases but as people?” Learning to define yours...11 years ago
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Culture, Christmas & Adoption - Somehow, in all the years I've watched Miracle on 34th Street, I've managed to miss this scene until this year, where a Dutch girl comes to see Macy's Sa...
11 years ago -
First holidays together.... - Tigger, S, and I had a wonderful Thanksgiving. We were with my parents and my relatives. S's relatives have all moved out of state and this was his first...
12 years ago -
Musings of the Lame: Life as a Birthmother: What's Wrong With the Adoption Tax Credit? - Please hop on over to Musings of the Lame, where Claudia has made it easy to let your law makers know that we will support a bill that HELPS FOSTER CHILD...12 years ago
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Back to school= quiet house - Back to school 2012 that's deserving of a blog post! Really, my house is quiet. The tears of sending Jack off to Kindergarten have passed. I have a mome...
12 years ago -
Moving - I have moved this blog to http://adoptingspecialneeds.wordpress.com. I hope you all move with me!12 years ago
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Absence Makes The Heart Grow........ - "Absence makes the heart grow founder". Does it really? Or does absence make the heart grow curious, empty, confused, or just plain hard? I never truly und...
12 years ago -
Finding Myself - Have any of you seen the movie, "Runaway Bride"? Well, there's a girl who has been engaged multiple times and ends up running off during the actual wedding...12 years ago
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Saddleback Church Orphan Summit: Five Reasons Why Rick Warren and Kay Warren Got it Wrong on Adoption and Orphan Care - Rick Warren and Kay Warren both spoke on the second day of the Eighth Christian Alliance for Orphans Summit (May 4, 2012), held at Saddleback Church. ...12 years ago
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Labels Change. “Foster Kid” to “Foster Parent” - Fifteen years ago, if you would have told me that I would one day be a foster parent, I would have laughed in your face. I wanted to be so far away from th...12 years ago
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Reminder - I moved to: http://insertbadmovietitlehere.wordpress.com Thanks for following!
12 years ago -
Recognition. - My biosister, Nicole, is a teenager and is 5 months pregnant. Obviously, when most people find this out, they are curious to know if she will place her ...
12 years ago -
Moved - I've got myself some new digs. If you want to follow, email me at: dandiesinthesunshine@hotmail.com12 years ago
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CW101 - Visit Logistics - The logistics of parent/child visitation may not be as hard as the emotional fallout, but I realize that it is a major cause of stress and frustration. So,...13 years ago
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Saying Goodbye To A Pet Is Never Easy - I lost my first baby, bandana boy, sooo sad. The decision was hard. And even though it may have been obvious, the loss of a pet is never easy. I still r...13 years ago
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Dealing with death and dysfunction - My maternal grandmother passed away last week. No condolences are necessary as I didn't know her. I wanted to know her. I tried to know her, but she was...13 years ago
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Just Sayin - In regard to some of the comments I am not and will not post Defensive behaviors can be the result of a: * Challenge to private or public perceptions of ou...13 years ago
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Moving Day - Tomorrow is August 29th, which is the deadline I set for myself to launch the newly designed site for Home (if I hadn't set the deadline I may have procra...13 years ago
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Farewell to Yoon's Blur - So, I know I just said I was going to take a break. But I have decided that, yes, it is time to go. No more "breaks." This is it. In light of all the "bre...13 years ago
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Musician Suzanne Vega Finds Her Birth Father--Her Blood Sings - Suzanne Vega's adopted. Sort of. At age 9 she found out her daddy wasn't her real daddy. She was also shocked because that meant she was White. (Adoptive d...
13 years ago -
My 30 Day Dating Diet - ----My 30 Day Dating Diet Journal---- "Embrace and appreciate your woman's mind." Tony Gaskins said. The immediate thought that rushed to my mind upon hea...
13 years ago -
Completely unreasonable - For some reason I feel a twinge of jealousy whenever a friend tells me that she is pregnant. Even though I myself was once pregnant and carried the baby (m...13 years ago
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Guest Post: A Grandmother’s Adoption Perspective - I’m excited to share my first guest post! This is from my mother, “Grandma G”, and this is her adoption story. ____________________________________________...13 years ago
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From the Beginning - Are you a new reader? Then may want to start here. See my main blog HERE. Screwed Up: My Life Part I Part II Part III Part IV Part V Part VI Part VII P...
14 years ago -
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Good Reads
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Applause11 years ago
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Show Me the Magic11 years ago
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Dragon Slippers14 years ago
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