To Tell The Truth - Please Stand Up

Adventures in Life, Parenting & Real World Navigation Through the Eyes of a Former Foster Kid, Current Foster Parent

The Many Voices Foster Care, Adoption & Child Advocacy

The adopted ones blog

I don’t have an answer, I don’t think there is one. - I’ve struggled lately to put one cohesive theme into a post, anything more than a paragraph just isn’t working, I get off-track like I’ve done in this post...
23 hours ago
Rage Against the Minivan

Friday Finds - 1. Lemonade Cardboard Stand | Target 2. World Market® | Lemon Verbena Bath and Body Collection 3. Sombrero Bottle Top Juicer | All Modern 4. Lano Lips ...
2 days ago
CHILDMYTHS

CALO and the Transferable Attachment: Love Your Dog, Love Me - From time to time I see advertisements for a residential treatment center known as CALO (www.caloteens.com), or for programs apparently related to this mo...
3 days ago
Lost Daughters

Found Daughter - My mother & I doing a Facebook Live event.The woman who gave birth to me lives two miles down the road from my house. Ours is a fairly ordinary mother / a...
4 days ago
[Birth Mother,] First Mother Forum

Contacting siblings when a first mother is silent - LorraineWhether to contact family members--when the first mother is not responding--is the question that comes up often, and it's a doozy. The adoptee who...
4 days ago
Exile of Xingnan

Being “Yellow” and Ashamed - I was talking to a friend via headset last week while gaming. We were waiting for a match to load. I was snuggling my Talking Stuffy because I like doing t...
4 days ago
Families R Built with Love

Thinking and living deeply - There are the days when my emo teen feels like he will drive me round the bend. Days when his sister "the tweenager" does the same. There are also some w...
1 week ago
Daniel Ibn Zayd

Excerpt: “Lose Your Mother”. - The following is an excerpt from the painful yet quite compelling and necessary read, Lose Your Mother [link] by Saidiya Hartman. Standing in the dark rece...
1 week ago
Sunshine Girl On A Rainy Day

Child Welfare Funding and How States Use It - **Click on picture to enlarge.* Visit this link to learn more.
1 week ago
Transracialeyes

The heart-warming solution to race that won’t die - So hip to adopt. A new generation of rainbow family. Am I being too cynical, or what? Adoptees, what are your thoughts on this millennial web t.v. fare? ...
2 weeks ago
Crash course in parenting - Life as a foster mom

TPR, home studies, and other things - We found out that Peanut's TPR hearing is coming right up, on August 14. Today would have been his dad's 45th birthday. I'm very sad for him, that he will...
3 weeks ago
Mother Issues

seeds - Sorry I disappeared again. It wasn’t a good time to talk about what’s going on because still nothing is resolved but sometimes I want to talk anyway and I’...
4 weeks ago
the5parkers

When Doctors Don't Tell You What You Want To Hear. - Let's talk infertility! To me, it's like a dirty word. It represents everything that I hate about myself. And, yet, it is the thing that brought my chil...
4 weeks ago
Cherub Mamma

questions I'd like an answer to - *I sent the following as an email to the director of our licensing agency:* In order to best prepare for a kiddo like Daisy, I am hoping that someone from ...
5 weeks ago
Sideshow Barb

packing it in - I’ve been working on a piece regarding Hulu’s series “The Handmaid’s Tale” for over a week, trying to make it right. This is not that post. We’ve been livi...
5 weeks ago
And other ideas and thoughts ....

Enjoyed reading through this blog - "We’re Indian-American with adopted white children and here’s what people ask us"
5 weeks ago
Foster 2 Forever - Adopting Children through Foster Care

4 Questions to Ask When Early Childhood Trauma Causes Behavior Issues - 4 Questions to Ask When Early Childhood Trauma Causes Behavior Issues Early childhood trauma can radically change the way a child’s brain experiences a s...
2 months ago
Adopto-Snark

GRACE GRACE GRACE GRACE GRACE - (Old news, but I wanted to post something.) I wonder how many adopted girls/women have been saddled with this name? Well, here’s one more: The little girl ...
3 months ago
"Neither Here Nor There..."

Never Lose Hope - It feels "as if" I'm dragging my body and mind through quick sand. Writing that sentence releases tears. Uncleverly avoided. 2013 was hard. So was...
5 months ago
kimberly gonzalez

Taking Refuge - Ever since I began studying Buddhism, I’ve struggled with the concept of taking refuge. I’ve heard several teachers humorously refer to the idea of taking ...
6 months ago
Indigo Child Khara

Even adoptees in good homes suffer the trauma of loss - Being an Asian adoptee in Norway, I did not have the lottery luck of ending up in a good home, which is a fact that has adversely shaped my life from child...
6 months ago
Fosterhood in NYC

Fosterwee Update, 2017 - fosterwee: Hi Friends. Quick update from the Harlem home of Fosterwee. Blitzen, Carrie and I officially adopted each other in September, 2016, nearly 1...
6 months ago
FosterWee

2017 Update - Quick update from NYC. Blitzen, Carrie and I officially adopted each other in September 2016, more than nine years after Blitzen entered the foster care sy...
6 months ago
Fleas Biting

Another day, Another Seizure... - Epilepsy never gets any easier. Or easier to write about. Awesome had another big seizure this morning. The second one this week. I find myself, as alwa...
7 months ago
Finding Christopher, Finding Myself

(Birth) Moms ~ Search for Your (adult) Child! - *from: Wild Women Sisterhood* *FULL MOON PRAYER by Rumi What in your life is Calling you, When all the noise is silenced, The meetings adjourned....
8 months ago
The Not So Secret Life of an Adoptee...Shhhhh they might hear you.

College Scholarships for Adoptees - *Did you know that there are scholarships available for adopted and foster children?* Many of these scholarships cover tuition cost, living expenses, c...
8 months ago
Pound Pup Legacy Feed

Americans adopted this South Korean man when he was 3. Now 41, he’s being deported. - https://www.washingtonpost.com/news/morning-mix/wp/2016/10/28/americans-... Adam Crapser was born in South Korea, but, when he was 3 years old, an Americ...
8 months ago
John Raible Online

Still hoping for change - A few days ago, I received a surprise email from a new student at the university where I work. Her heartfelt message touched me, and she gave me permission...
9 months ago
Fostering Attachment

Appreciation for Suits for Success Partners - Click to enlarge In the words of the youth themselves, as written in their evaluations: - Thank you *(many, many youth wrote this in their evaluation...
11 months ago
welcome to my brain . net

All Parent Blogs in One Place! - If you are looking for all of my blog posts pertaining to therapeutic parenting, you can locate those on my coaching site. Neat and tidy. I'll see you over...
1 year ago
FAMILY PRESERVATION ADVOCACY

I HATE THE WORD ADOPTION! - Back in the 1980s MaryAnne Cohen wrote the following poem. It is published in my first book *shedding light on...The Dark Side of Adoption, *(1988): *ADOPT...
1 year ago
Parenting Your Adopted Child: Tweens, Teens & Beyond

Parenting and Partnering: I Hope You Dance - Do you dance? I do, although not as well as my husband. I can work through and memorize the steps and patterns, but the fluidity takes some time. In fact, ...
1 year ago
Scooping it Up

Mother's Day Self Care Looks Like... - ... knowing that we needed to do something different. It is usually a complicated day for me, sometimes horrible. Hubs was super supportive and orchestrate...
1 year ago
Writing My Wrongs

Wallowing in Grief - Yet another great piece on grieving from Tim Lawrence at his blog The Adversity Within. Link to full post below. A few of my favorite quotes also below. ...
1 year ago
Once Was Von

10 Cara Mengatasi Rambut Rontok Secara Alami Yang Praktis dan Mudah - Cara mengatasi rambut rontok secara alami seringkali menjadi pilihan yang dilakukan oleh banyak orang karena dianggap mudah dan terjangkau, selain itu ju...
1 year ago
Letting Go of Mie

Tuesday's Tears - Mie, the Trauma Survivor -
1 year ago
Just What The Hell Am I Supposed To Call This?

Manfaat Buah Jambu Air Bagi Kesehatan Tubuh - Manfaat Buah Jambu Air Bagi Kesehatan Tubuh – Buah jambu air adalah buah yang sudah sangat familiar di Indonesia. Buag ini dinamakan jambu air karena di ...
1 year ago
Our Little Tongginator

Chinese New Year Chapter Books for Older Kids - There are many lists about Chinese New Year books for preschoolers and young elementary students, but very few highlight chapter books for middle graders a...
1 year ago
Taste of Kimchi

가는 말이 고와야 오는 말이 곱다 - I am Korean born. 한국어 탄생. 입양인.
1 year ago
The Declassified Adoptee

Safe Haven? A Baby Abandoned in a Nativity Scene isn't a "Feel Good" Christmas Story - Copyright: kevron2001 Yesterday, a friend posted a link to an NPR piece that drew heartwarming conclusions of Biblical proportion regarding the recent aban...
1 year ago
Love Is Not a Pie

#FlipTheScript on National Adoption Month: Day Two - pendant & photo by Rosita Gonzalez of mothermade *#FlipTheScript Prompt: Talk about the “adoptee in the room” moment—that moment when you realize you ar...
1 year ago
Land of Gazillion Adoptees

We’ve moved - Hi All, LGA has relaunched, and the website is located here. We’ll keep this site live as an archive of our former self. Please change your bookmarks to re...
1 year ago
Adoption Truth

Shout It Out - So, between taking my sweet Granddaughter to Disney World and getting into our family place at the lake, I’ve spent most of September barely on social med...
1 year ago
Foster Parenting Adventures

IEPs and children who have experienced trauma (post 2 in series) - *Problem* *Traditional behavior charts which include positive motivators (such as sticker charts, extra free time, treasure box prizes) and negative motiv...
1 year ago
I Was A Foster Kid

back to the dentist and back to dogs - . Tomorrow i go back to the dentist for my 2nd appointment with the cool dentist, but the mean hygienist. i am more nervous than i was the first time. i ...
2 years ago
Rileys in Uganda

Guest Post: David Smolin shares his experience as a speaker at this years Christians Alliance for Orphan (CAFO) summit - In CAFO’s own words their summit “inspires and equips Christians to care for orphans with wisdom-guided love. The CAFO Summit has become the national hub...
2 years ago
noah baby

How to Clean a Toilet - Cleaning a toilet is very important task for the household to spend a healthy and active life. Dirty toilet causes bad smell and produce a number of germs ...
2 years ago
my fascinating life

Near and Far - Here's what Christmas was like when I was a child in Australia: presents in the morning around our family Christmas tree, then over to our grandparents' h...
2 years ago
One Inch of Grace

How to Braid Blond Hair - I wrote the following as a guest post for another blog several months ago. It was never published there, so I wanted to share it here instead. Before our k...
2 years ago
Mothering4Money

School Supply List 2014-2015 - I currently have 7 children, 5 of whom will be in public school this year. Their combined school supply list is forever long. Good thing I buy things on sa...
2 years ago
A Family of My Own

Small Update - I mailed my Dad’s Father’s Day card, which included my letter to him asking him to adopt me back, today. Now I’m nervous, but it probably won’t even get to...
3 years ago
Wandering alongside my Little Wolayta Warrior

Letting go of The Hard. Good night. - Why couldn't I just leave it here, unfinished? I don't know. Yet, it haunts me. This year, I become aware, one of the things I really needed to do was "Let...
3 years ago
Ain't That Sherific?

They Just Don't Get It . . . - I have decided to take my son out of school at the end of this year. For years I was intent on the fact that he would be in school as long as they allowed...
3 years ago
Stellar Parenting 101

Monday Moments. - Hey look I came back, amazing I know. Things continue to be super busy. The kids had a calmer week, well most of them did, which was good, calm is good. D...
3 years ago
Fostering Thrifty Families

Great Deal on gDiapers Hybrid Cloth Diapers with Flushable Liners (LIMITED TIME) - One of my favorite ways to be a thrifty foster parent is to cloth diaper! For our family it's been a fantastic way to protect our foster babies' tender tu...
3 years ago
I Will Pull This Blog Over!

Not the White Christmas I am Dreaming of.... - In light of the totally and complete idiocy surrounding the new debate about whether a FICTIONAL character is black or white, (and the subsequent white was...
3 years ago
SocialWrkr24/7 : Eyes Opened Wider

OAB Interview Day!! Meet Ashley... - Oh how I love Open Adoption Bloggers - especially the Adoption Interview Project. Meet Ashley from Blessings in a Basket! I loved getting to know Ashley...
3 years ago
The Daily Bastardette

Daiily Bastardette moving to Word Press - After a couple years of talking to myself about it, I have decided to transfer *The Daily Bastardette* from Blogger to Word Press. The final straw came...
3 years ago
Production, Not Reproduction

Well, Hello There - Hello! How are you? I miss writing here so much! But that is not what I am here today to say. [image: Adoption Blogger Interview Project 2013] The Adoptio...
3 years ago
Out of the Fog

Cross Post From My Reunited Cricket Blog: Stop Saying That!! - *STOP SAYING THAT!!*
3 years ago
Fantastic Lies

Party Animals - *I understand this post is almost a year over due, but the theme of this blog is better late then never. * All I wanted for my bachelorette party was to ...
3 years ago
Fostering Awareness

She's 4!! - Happy Birthday Bri!!
3 years ago
The Luckiest {Unlucky} Girl

Luca's 3rd Bday - I was there the day he was born. I can not believe this little baby is THREE years old. (Click to Enlarge) Someone please tell him to stop growing...
4 years ago
Life in the Grateful House

Trauma Doesn't Tell Time - Robyn Gobbel, LCSW, wrote a blog post regarding trauma, implicit and explicit memories. I don't know Robyn but now I'm seriously crushing on her. Here is...
4 years ago
Percolated Paradox

Guess who got a job? - Me. That's who! My background check was finally fixed and the transitional living program offered me a job. It will be a night job that doesn't pay enoug...
4 years ago
Foster Mama & the kiddos

Oh My it has been AWHILE! - Well... by the looks of things around the blog I got busy :) I can't believe it has been since August that I last updated on our journey. I don't have time...
4 years ago
In Writing Motherhood

This Mother - What do we take? What do we leave? What do we publish and invite the world to disparage? Before I was a mother I was a writer for 20 years. And then I met...
4 years ago
My Tsehai

Orphans, Orphanage in children's movies and books? - If you are a member of the adoption triad you probably know of Disney's need to kill off a parent in every movie. We avoid any movies that I know have a ne...
4 years ago
FormerFosterTalk

Defining Ourselves for Ourselves - An Alumni Sister asked, “how do we learn to define ourselves for ourselves and learn to not see ourselves as cases but as people?” Learning to define yours...
4 years ago
AdoptionTalk

Culture, Christmas & Adoption - Somehow, in all the years I've watched Miracle on 34th Street, I've managed to miss this scene until this year, where a Dutch girl comes to see Macy's Sa...
4 years ago
It's You and Me Kid!

First holidays together.... - Tigger, S, and I had a wonderful Thanksgiving. We were with my parents and my relatives. S's relatives have all moved out of state and this was his first...
4 years ago
Our Foster Family Tree

Musings of the Lame: Life as a Birthmother: What's Wrong With the Adoption Tax Credit? - Please hop on over to Musings of the Lame, where Claudia has made it easy to let your law makers know that we will support a bill that HELPS FOSTER CHILD...
4 years ago
the fiddlehead report...a day in the life of the Rikkers

Back to school= quiet house - Back to school 2012 that's deserving of a blog post! Really, my house is quiet. The tears of sending Jack off to Kindergarten have passed. I have a mome...
4 years ago
Adopting Special Needs

Moving - I have moved this blog to http://adoptingspecialneeds.wordpress.com. I hope you all move with me!
4 years ago
The Burden of Thought

See ya. - Well, I’m done. This blog has run its course. It got to be more of a burden (har har) than something I wanted to spend time doing. I had all sorts of thing...
5 years ago
I'm Still a Good Mother; A Birth Mother's Journey Through Open Adoption

Absence Makes The Heart Grow........ - "Absence makes the heart grow founder". Does it really? Or does absence make the heart grow curious, empty, confused, or just plain hard? I never truly und...
5 years ago
Always in My Heart: An Adoption Journey

Finding Myself - Have any of you seen the movie, "Runaway Bride"? Well, there's a girl who has been engaged multiple times and ends up running off during the actual wedding...
5 years ago
From Foster Kid to Foster Parent

Labels Change. “Foster Kid” to “Foster Parent” - Fifteen years ago, if you would have told me that I would one day be a foster parent, I would have laughed in your face. I wanted to be so far away from th...
5 years ago
Insert Bad Movie Title Here

Reminder - I moved to: http://insertbadmovietitlehere.wordpress.com Thanks for following!
5 years ago
Words of weary memories that I can always see

Recognition. - My biosister, Nicole, is a teenager and is 5 months pregnant. Obviously, when most people find this out, they are curious to know if she will place her ...
5 years ago
workshop for beginners

Moved - I've got myself some new digs. If you want to follow, email me at: dandiesinthesunshine@hotmail.com
5 years ago
Rita's Rituals

Saying Goodbye To A Pet Is Never Easy - I lost my first baby, bandana boy, sooo sad. The decision was hard. And even though it may have been obvious, the loss of a pet is never easy. I still r...
5 years ago
Seventeen Pillows

Dealing with death and dysfunction - My maternal grandmother passed away last week. No condolences are necessary as I didn't know her. I wanted to know her. I tried to know her, but she was...
5 years ago
Adoptive Parents Speak

Just Sayin - In regard to some of the comments I am not and will not post Defensive behaviors can be the result of a: * Challenge to private or public perceptions of ou...
5 years ago
Home

Moving Day - Tomorrow is August 29th, which is the deadline I set for myself to launch the newly designed site for Home (if I hadn't set the deadline I may have procra...
5 years ago
Yoon's Blur

Farewell to Yoon's Blur - So, I know I just said I was going to take a break. But I have decided that, yes, it is time to go. No more "breaks." This is it. In light of all the "bre...
5 years ago
May I Have a Word?

Musician Suzanne Vega Finds Her Birth Father--Her Blood Sings - Suzanne Vega's adopted. Sort of. At age 9 she found out her daddy wasn't her real daddy. She was also shocked because that meant she was White. (Adoptive d...
6 years ago
Jacquinn Speaks

My 30 Day Dating Diet - ----My 30 Day Dating Diet Journal---- "Embrace and appreciate your woman's mind." Tony Gaskins said. The immediate thought that rushed to my mind upon hea...
6 years ago
Screwed Up: My Story

From the Beginning - Are you a new reader? Then may want to start here. See my main blog HERE. Screwed Up: My Life Part I Part II Part III Part IV Part V Part VI Part VII P...
7 years ago
Tubaville

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Full Circle

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La Bicicleta

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And Then There Were Seven

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The Anywhere but Here Girl...

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Caring for Other People's Children

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Home

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The Chronicles of Munchkin Land

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The Warrior Princess Diaries

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The Mom With Brownies

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Joy's Division

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I'm A Foster.com. Life before, during, and after foster care.

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iAdoptee

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The Adoption Counselor

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Insert Bad Movie Title Here

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From the Past into the Future

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Elaine's Blog

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Last Mom

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Whispers of a Former Foster Child

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Gold to Refine

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Real Daughter

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Angry Adoptive Mom

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Real Daughter has moved to wordpress

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Musings of the Lame: Life as a Birthmother

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Life After Foster Care

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Relearning to Fly

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